Yes. You read it correctly. This was my winter break read of choice; it took me a good two hours to read it. I just couldn’t stop! Anyway, in this self-help read , author Sherry Argov not only defines the “bxtch,” and what she represents, but she also gives excellent perspectives and insight from males.
The book is highly satirical and places the reader at ease from the very first page. In the introduction, she thoroughly describes the context in which the word “bxtch,” will be used. She says, “The woman I’m describing is kind yet strong. She has a strength that is ever so subtle. She doesn’t give up her life, and she won’t chase a man. She won’t let a man think he has a 100 percent “hold” on her. And she’ll stand up for herself when he steps over the line.” Sounds like a pretty “bad bxtch” if you ask me!
Here are the main points that I took from the book:
Men love and need challenge; don’t let them down!
You cook his food, you wash his clothes, you pay his bills, hell you even scrub the kitchen floor in stilettos and booty shorts. You never have anything interesting to share, you have absolutely no opinions about ANYTHING, and on top of all that you don’t have any goals for yourself except to be with him! What’s the problem here? Um, you’re a freaking doormat, and this dude is about to wipe off all his dirt on you and keep it pumpin’. According to Argov, and I have to agree, one of the biggest mistakes women make in relationships is losing sight of themselves and the things they were interested in before the relationship. Be vocal, pick up a book, develop hobbies and crafts that you love. Be a complete person, sans the man. He should be an addition to your life, not your life itself.
Grab hold of your emotions, and don’t let them go.
I loved this paragraph :
“To better understand why men are put off by needy women, keep this example in mind. Ever had a girlfriend who always comes around when she is upset over some guy? In between relationships, she is nowhere to be found. After not hearing from her for two months, she cries on your shoulder when the guy blows her off. Then you don’t see her again until the next guy dumps her.”
Come on, now you know after a few rounds of this foolishness, imagine how you’d feel. Eventually the relationship would be no more, because your friend isn’t “contributing anything” to it! This is the same way Argov proposes men feel when women are too dependent on them. It begins to seem as if the relationship is going nowhere fast because you are no longer contributing anything to it.
She lists many “Attraction Principles” throughout the book. This is one of my favorites: “He must feel that you choose to be with him, not that you need to be with him. Only then will he perceive you as a equal partner.” There is no better way to lower your appeal than to be needy. I would like a needy puppy,but not a needy boyfriend or spouse! I want a mother that babies me, and is relatively predictable, but a predictable boyfriend would not be the move. Why? Well, I can buy a puppy if I want, and I already have a mom. In a relationship you want to feel that you’ve met your MATCH, not your “caretaker” or your “pet.”
These are just a few main points that I took from the book, but there is much more helpful information in it. It is directed towards women that are way too nice in relationships. This book screams, “bxtch, get some freakin backbone!” Too often as women I think we are blinded by the possibility of “being in love,” and all that mushy stuff, instead of sitting back and enjoying the relationships you have, and contributing to their growth. So my recommendation is that if you are “too nice” to men and you often feel used and abused by them, or even if you just want a good laugh, click here to check out this book today.
Official Website: Sherry Argov
Do you think these are substantial relationship suggestions? Thoughts?
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